Self Portrait
How did I know, half my life ago, that this is how I would look and feel today as a mother of two small children each getting over a cold and one of them teething. I'm feeling lonely today, so Bitter Betty's coming down to save me. I know I'm not alone in this weird, isolated job that they call motherhood.
28 Comments:
I feel your pain...for awhile this winter, I just about forgot what it felt like to have everyone in my house, including me, healthy at the same time!
I'm sure Ms. Beth will do a great job saving you. :) And, if I could, I would totally stop by to either (a) cheer you up, (b) watch the boys while you escape, (c) let you vent, or (d) other _ _ _ _.
I'm totally in awe of your self portrait. It's amazing. I'd almost believe it's sculpture. Your use of color to create depth and visual planes is just awesome.
your self portrait is magnificent and the light you have created in it is amazing. i am glad bethany is coming by to help you out of your funk. is it weird to say i am proud of you for asking for her help? i am not good at that and will wallow in a funk, by myself, for far too long. i am inspired by you not to let that happen the next time.
whoa...what an amazing painting.
no, you are definately NOT alone. how great to have such a pal so close...we all need that little pick me up to get through the rough patches.
Sorry I wasn't here when you called. I had to take Dad down to Monterey to get his staples out (from his knee-replacement). He is doing shockingly well.
Anyway, I wish I had been here. I love you. For a variety of reasons.
Wow. You. Can. Paint.
And, no, you are far from alone. It just feels like it sometimes. The day comes when you look BACK at it and congratulate yourself on the achievement that is grown-up kids who still like you :)
ps Sometimes you just need A BREAK. Even an hour or two doing something else,ANYTHING else, can make a difference
Too bad we're not neighbors. I seriously check my reflection in shop windows sometimes to see if Gary Busey's mugshot is looking back. Thank God for the good old internets.
Your painting skills are pretty great by the way.
It starts out so nice. Meeting other gals with bambinos in coffeeshops and then it slowly changes. Teething, whining, incessant needs... Playgroups, chauffering to activities. I feel like I am at the stage where mothers with a couple of kids feel their lives are perfectly full and don't even bother to introduce themselves to other mothers while standing on the sidelines. It's always changing. So in the words of one of the worst and only second horror movie I ever saw "It'll pass Ed Harley. It'll pass." (I think it's called Pumpkinhead or something). But you know that! Being lonely is no good. Bring on the Betty!
ps- why do I constantly flunk the letter tests? I think I have a problem.
aaahh...that painting tells a lot. I am a sahm of 3 kids, 6, 4 and 2. I very much know what you are talking about. I can get very lonely...and feel very used by the end of the day. Only to start again the next morning. Hang in there, we all go through varying degrees of this "mommy despair". Laugh as much as you can. At every moment possible.
Beautiful painting, it tells a powerful story.
God do I know what you're feeling right now.
You'll have a great time with BB.
That is an amazing painting.
Do you still have my number? Call me and we can have a mutual gripe. There are those times I darkly wish I had a nanny and a studio. Well, the studio is not such a dark wish.
You love them all dearly....but there are times you just want yourself back: you! for ten minutes!! You who smiles!
After I wrote my post, Max looked at me and said 'can you show me your angry eyebrows'. And I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
Your very much not alone. Please know that.
And keep painting.
Sounds like my life! I am just now coming out of my hole from the winter sickies and blues (I have never had such bad PMS man!). I know we haven't met yet, but we totally should (I 'm sure the kids would get along too!)
I have joined in the Handmade Parade on Saturday, May 5th in Sacramento, CA. You should check it out and come on up. Clare & Missy have set up a blog to highlight the crafters who will be there.
www.handmadeparade.blogspot.com
PS I think Bitter Betty is doing it too-
Definitely not alone. I'm sitting here at past midnight with a husband ill in bed and a daughter that's unable to sleep. In the last 16 hours I've had precisely 3.5 hours break from her.
Love your painting!
I know how you feel.
I got a shock today when I went to my blog and saw your comment. I am just doing it for a record for myself. ...not enough time to blog properly with 3 kids.
this job is the hardest, boringest, stressfulest, least time offiest, don't even get to pee aloneiest job ever! I'll keep it!
I know how you feel - both my little ones have a cold, one of them has been teething for the past 12 months, and now I got sick myself....and have a really crazy deadline to finish a bunch of work. Ughhh....
One thing that makes me smile if I feel the way your painting looks, is to think how fast this time will be gone and how soon they will not need to curl up in my lap and wipe their snot on my shirt.
And then I sometimes am even able to enjoy the tough nights when I just dont get to sleep, because they are , after all, so warm and cuddly and sweet - and because I am the only one posessing the magic to make them feel better :-)
Yep, you are definitely not alone in this. Moms have the toughest job on the planet.
Even moms needs a break once in a while.
Thank you for posting your painting. Ahhh...classic college days.
Wow! your self portrait is great!
I feel like this sometimes, "Only that you need is a break" says my friend. And she is rigth.
Ah yes, motherhood is a hard hard job. I sometimes feel like selling mine on Ebay! But the smiles and hugs make up for it. I don't even get to go to the loo on my own i have an audience or a small child banging on the door. The best thing i've done recently is implement a regular bedtime routine so i get time to myself after they are in bed.
This painting is remakable! Says it all.
Perhaps if you wore 'The Whimsical Meadow' for a while your spirit would be recharged. Cheer up.
I'm a little slow keeping up these days, so I bet you're already feeling much saner, but you have my sympathies at any rate. It's so tough to be alone, especially alone and responsible for other beings.
The portrait is gorgeous, and shows you as tough, strong, dark, deep, human, real. I don't know what size it is, but even on my computer screen, you look larger than life.
And very talented as a painter.
Thanks for sharing.
I was feeling guilty, but I see I am normal and other girls have similar stuff in their lives..get well. Motherhood is hard job! I have 2 kids and my husband is the only close friend I have and I only see him 10 days each month...oh my...oh dear...
Wonderful self portrait, Michelle. I hope things got better after Bitter Betty's visit.
xoxo
Fantastic painting
really awesome painting! what a gutsy self-portrait.
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